What drives each of us to set goals and seek to achieve them?
You may think there are many reasons that would drive our actions, however, there are only really three core reasons. The first is because we are driven to become a different person – to BE more. The second is linked to our capabilities and our drive to want to utilise these capabilities – to DO more. And the third is attached to things we seek to acquire – to HAVE more.
Reflect back on significant events that may have occurred in your past. Perhaps you became a parent for the first time. This type of significant event tends to create an identity shift as you learn to develop and BECOME a ‘mother’ identity or a ‘father’ identity. To do this you explore characteristics, values and beliefs about yourself that you need to adapt or create from scratch in order to help you BE this person.
Your first job represents a time in your life where you were driven to prove yourself, to test out your capabilities and receive recognition for what you were capable of DOING. Think back to your attitude at the time. Maybe you were more driven than you are now, perhaps more assertive and focused on demonstrating all that you could do to be of value to the team and the business.
Across our lives there are many things that we have desired to HAVE be it a car, a house, a high-class watch, a bag and so on. We set a goal to obtain these things and we work to get the resources that enable us to invest in these items.
Upon reflection you may notice that at different points in your life one of these drivers may be more dominant than the others. That is typically the pattern that we each experience. However, these drivers when used together, become extremely powerful in helping propel you towards the outcomes you seek in each area of your life.
Imagine if you set a goal around something you desired to obtain (HAVE) and then created a plan of that actions you need to take to obtain the goal (DO) and looked inward to see if you were willing to become who you needed to be to be worthy of that outcome (BE). Using all three motivators ensures you take a holistic and robust approach to goal setting.
Use this basic model below to help you when you next seek to achieve an outcome.
Ask yourself the three questions displayed and notice how you will naturally align your outcome, that which you want to have, to what you are willing to do and who you are prepared to become. When these three motivators are out of alignment it makes it very challenging for you to reach your outcome because you aren’t congruent and accepting of what you need to do and who you need to be in order to have what you want.
